Mothering

I recently wrote a letter to a friend who is expecting her first child. I remember my first pregnancy. It was such a wonderful, special time. It was full of wonder and anticipation.

I had a difficult time writing the letter. I don't know how to put words on a page that describe what it is to be a parent, what it is to be a mother. It is beautiful and there are moments where that place of perfection is overwhelming. There are also moments when it is nothing like I ever dreamed it would be. It's messy, humbling, insanely repetitive. Mothering challenges my own selfishness. It can be difficult.

This week has been one of those where the beauty plays a secondary role to the the requirements I never expected. Those things I didn't think I had the strength for require strength from me. And somehow it happens. I'm able to do what I didn't think possible. Maybe that's the really amazing thing about being a mother. Somehow we draw power, wisdom and stamina to do what needs to be done on behalf of the lives entrusted to our care.