Heavy Heart

Sometimes life just really stinks...at least within our very human point of view. Now is one of those times in my life. Unfortunately, it's also that way in the lives of many I love.

Almost three weeks ago I spent several hours with my brother. My sister-in-law and I tried every method we could to convince him to ride home with us. The weather for the evening was perfect. Rain was coming down thick and heavy and it was cold. I shivered in the back seat. Maybe that didn't have to do with the weather, though.

I have never experienced anything quite like that night. In my brother's cycle of addiction, I'd always managed to have some excuse for him. Either the situation was really tough, his pain level was high, he didn't feel appreciated, etc, etc. In the midst of this, I knew he needed to make the right decisions, but I think I also glossed over much of the cycle as I didn't get it...or didn't want to.

This night was different, though. I experienced the crisis with my brother and sister-in-law rather than hearing about it later.

I had prayed with my brother earlier in the evening. I knew he was struggling, but didn't realize the degree. I wish he would have told me. I wish he would have allowed me to help...

I wish he would have allowed one of us to drive him home. We gave him the keys, thinking that by then he was sober enough to drive. My sister-in-law drove up on the accident. She called sobbing. She was afraid he was gone, forever. He made it through the accident with just a few scrapes. The consequences go much deeper than the scratches on his face, though.

I love my brother. He is my friend. We've spent hours at a time talking theology and church practice. We've encouraged each other, prayed for each other, shared our dreams and grown together. I see so much potential in my brother. He has an amazing vision and is one of the most intelligent people I've ever met. He is an alcoholic, but that is by far not who he really is. It's just so difficult to see through the effects of the addiction. It feels like he's in a cage and we can't get to him. We can't pull him out.

I want to pull him out. If I could figure out a way, I would. I know that this is his battle to fight, though. I don't know how to help, or even if I can. I wish this next bit were going to be easy. My prayer is for each one of us, and specifically for my brother, that God's hand is on us, guiding us and providing his wisdom in each step we take as well as each step we don't take.

Aaron Appleseed

My parent's are moving out to Denver in less than a month (hurray)! They are moving from a house built in 1972 which has full-grown apple trees just outside the back door. Every time we go visit them, the kids enjoy watching the birds that congregate around the trees. And of course, picking apples off the trees in Fall is a favorite. The house they are moving to is only 5 years old and is lacking anything near these mature trees and the habitat they've provided for the local birds.

For the last month or so my oldest son, Aaron, who just turned 6 last Saturday, has been collecting all the seeds from his apples and putting them in a little piece of pottery he made at school this year.

Earlier this week, I overheard him talking to a friend and share that he has been collecting the seeds so that Nana & Papa can plant apple trees at the new house because he knows they'll miss home with their apple trees and birds.

Now, isn't that incredibly thoughtful?

God's Clothes

Our baby Robins started flapping their wings today, meaning they should be out of their nest in the next week or so. I shot this photo this afternoon, but the birds shied away quickly so I missed the flutter-practice.

Matthew 6:25-34 continues to capture my imagination.

This week I was reading Slaves, Women and Homosexuals by William J. Webb. In it, he exlpores what is called a "redemptive-trend" hermeneutic. As he looks at the creation and fall stories, he examines the clothing of Adam and Eve after the fall.

Genesis 3:21 states, "The Lord God made garments of skin for Adam and his wife and clothed them." This description directly follows the curse. Per Webb, the clothing passage is not part of the curse, but rather the first sign of God's mercy toward humankind. God killed one of his own creation, that which he called "good", in order to cover the shame of Adam and Eve and begin drawing them back into relationship with him. Wow! I've always seen this as an afterthought almost...done primarily because they were embarrassed. The gravity of the situation and the starkness of God's gracious act toward Adam and Eve didn't quite sink in. The precedent for the sacrifical system was set by God.

As I thought about God clothing Adam and Eve in this way, my mind went back to the section in Matthew 6 where Jesus tells his disciples that if the flowers and grasses are clothed more beautifully than Solomon, then surely they can trust God to clothe them.

What does it mean to be clothed by God? That's a question I can't quite get my mind around.

Thoughts On Sphere Sovereignty

Last week we watched video 9 of the Truth Project. I’ve been mulling it over ever since. The “tour”, as each session is called in the series, addressed “the state”. In the course of the video, Dr. Tackett covered God’s design for the state, both its designed role and its responsibility in relationship with other areas of life (called spheres) such as church and family.

The strength of this particular tour is the emphasis that as followers of Christ, we are not to allow the state to become our king and our provider. God is that to us. Although not explicitly stated in the video, I also gleaned out of this week’s presentation that neither should we depend on the state to take care of that which God has called us to; caring for the poor, the widows and the orphans…the least of these.

The greatest weakness of this tour was the discussion of “sphere sovereignty.” This term was coined Abraham Kuyper, a Dutch theologian and statesman in the late 19th century. It was later further developed by Herman Dooyeweerd, among others. To state it very broadly and with only a couple hours of research under my belt, the idea was that God created the world with spheres and each holds its own inherent value and law that is sovereign to itself. Primary examples of these spheres are the state, church and family, but can also include arts, science, and education among others. (There is a lot of interesting material on sphere sovereignty. I recommend googling it and doing some reading on the subject if you’re at all interested).

At one point, Dr. Tackett states that there’s something the old western movies got right. He provides the illustration of a posse chasing someone who then runs into the local church. The posse does not breech the doors of the church as that is considered “God’s territory”, not the state’s. This is provided as a terrific example of appropriate sphere sovereignty. This is a very inadequate and, I would posit, incorrect understanding of sphere sovereignty. What the video failed to capture was that by harboring a criminal (assuming that the posse was actually chasing a “bad” guy”), the church was breaching the sovereignty appropriate to the state (term used loosely as “state” in that environment is much different than it is defined today).

One primary claim of the more conservative proponents of sphere sovereignty is that by funding education and/or healthcare, the state is overstepping the responsibility God gave this particular sphere. They state that this responsibility should rightly fall to the church or the family. Sounds like it makes sense, doesn’t it? But, then my mind is flooded with exceptions. The first that comes to mind is the recent problems of sexual abuse within the Catholic church. The church attempted to handle this within its own sphere, to the detriment of the children entrusted to this institution. I also think of the inner cities, which, if left to their own, lack the appropriate resources to provide education to their children, which is easily obtained by those in the wealthier suburbs. The question boils down to how we implement biblical principles with life in a consumer-driven, industrial, capitalist, modern/post-modern environment. It’s not as easy as saying, “Stay off my turf.”

My basic point is this, sphere sovereignty, as presented by the Truth Project, is problematic and not a great basis for a fully formed and informed Christian worldview.

To follow that up, I think it is imperative that each of us, both individually and collectively, should consider what our responsibility as Christian social agents should be in light of the various spheres in which we reside. Rather than pointing fingers at what other spheres should not be doing, I believe it would behoove us to ensure that we are fulfilling Jesus’ call to love God with all our heart, mind, soul and strength and to love others as ourselves.

Some People are Weird

I had to take my three kids to the post office yesterday (which I try to avoid at all costs).

On the way out of the store, an older man (notice, I left off "gentle") asked, "So you're catholic." Astonished, I just answered, "No." So, he asks, "Mormon?" Again, with a bewildered and somewhat annoyed look on my face, I said, "No." To which he replied, "Oh...you must like to have fun."

At this point, the three other people in the room, all business men, turned around in astonishment as well. Flabergasted and quite at a loss for how to respond, I quite kindly told the man that it would be in his best interest to mind his own business on these matters. He was quite offended at me.

Some people are quite odd.

The Birds of the Air

The kids are all down for naps this afternoon. We had a busy day yesterday and I know they're exhuasted, as am I.

I'm sipping a cup of coffee and looking out the window at our robin cozied up in her nest. Last year this robin made her nest at the roofline straight out our front door. She spent about a week gathering leaves, branches and such making a soft little bed for her and her babies. We can see directly down into the nest from my sons' bedroom window. We saw the three blue, speckled eggs, the wide-open hungry mouths of the baby birds, demanding food from mommy. They grew fat and fluffy until one day they stood on the edge of the nest, tentatively beat their wings and then flew away. We did not see them again...

Until about three weeks ago. The momma came back. She rebuilt the nest that sagged on the eaves from the heavy winter snow. She nestled herself into it, making sure of the right fit. And now she's waiting for her babies to grow big enough inside the eggs to make their appearance into the world.

As I watch her, I think of the scripture in Matthew, "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? 26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?" (Matt. 6:25-26 TNIV)

What is it to not worry in this context? I've always assumed it meant just to not worry, that God can take care of me, so I should trust him. It seems that reading it in context the "worry" here could also serve a broader category. In Matthew 5, we have the Sermon on the Mount, the Beattitudes and the beginning of almost three chapters of instruction and teaching by Jesus. He teaches on the fulfillment of the law, addresses murder and adultery of the heart, he chastises the Pharisees for their outward dilligence to the law without the right inward attitude.

Knowing that Jesus has just taught that the law has been fulfilled and begins to subvert the Law, as understood by the Pharisees, with a law of the heart in Jesus, what does trusting God look like? Just a few verses later, Jesus says, " Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; those who seek find; and to those who knock, the door will be opened. Which of you, if your son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him! So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets." (Matt 7:7-12, TNIV)

I think it all goes back to the state of our heart. I think Jesus is challenging those he is teaching to move past all the externals by which people measure successful faith and adherence to law. A changed life will not be found there. This "faith thing" is not a part-time hobby nor is it based on actions we perform. It's about the barest, most naked and ashamed parts of me opened to the One who provides change and hope and love. "Do not worry," God says, "If I care for this little robin, will I not care for you, the one whom I've made in my image, in my likeness, the one I formed in her mother's womb and laid out her days before her?"

God, as you care for this robin who finds a safe place in the eaves of our home, I ask you to work in my heart to trust you to care for me as well.